Tuesday, September 23, 2008
I was running on the gym treadmill Sunday when my brain revolted. My gym is set up like most others -- rows of treadmill and elliptical machines maybe ten wide and five deep with 10 or so televisions bracketed to the ceiling in the front.
With 10 channels, you can watch several shows at one time. Helllllo, Men in Black II and CIS. Distract me from my Sunday long run.
Please and thank you.
So... Will Smith is fighting all these aliens, right? They blow up and throw chunks of green slime. Then he erases everyone's memory with the neutralizer.
Aye-ya. Oooooe-bacha. Ka-pow.
Movies are a marvel. Popcorn would be nothing without the theater--Word.
When a commerical for Swiffer Sweeper came on I went back to watching CIS.
I had no idea what was going on in this show, but alas, it's a colorful glowing box, so I'm entertained. One of the CIS-ers was digging through an old box looking for clues and pulled out a photo slide. He held it up to his eye and the light to see what the image was, and I thought, "Yeah, he must be getting ready to neutralize someone."
Uh. Wrong show, Steph. Chuckle, chuckle.
But it triggered something deep inside me, like God wanted to tell me something through my weirdness. And that is, when you try to live two ways, it doesn't work. Investigators looking to solve a complicated crime also have to fight aliens and erase memories?
I don't really want to watch that show.
But I for sure don't want to go back to my old life before Christ. I for sure don't want to live without perfect love. And I for sure sometimes make decisions and act and live like I'm unchanged.
"I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself—after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison. What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary. But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time. It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge."
So, I'm not be the best at predicting, but changed I am. It's not my flesh that's alive, it's Jesus inside of me, because... "If Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness." Romans 8:10.
It's quite a random thing to be reminded of my broken bonds when watching aliens.